I know I've only been married for a few months, but I feel that I've learned a lot in a short time, and have also been given some incredible advice, and Cameron and I would like to share it with all of you! Cameron is the luckiest man alive because I am his wife!!* Cameron wrote that part. ;)
Before we get into this list,
let’s have a few words about communication.
It’s important to be honest with your spouse, tell them how you are feeling, express your needs and wants as pertaining to physical, emotional, spiritual, and any-other-category-you-can-think-of. How is your spouse supposed to help you if you don’t let them know what you need? “He/she should be able to read my mind!” Wouldn’t that be nice? But unfortunately, it’s not going to happen. Even the most discerning of spouses needs a little help sometimes!
But there’s another part of communicating
that’s often forgotten: listening.
If you’re opening up to your spouse, would you want them to brush it off and say, “but you don’t understand how I feel!” or, “That’s not as important as what I need!” NO, you wouldn’t. So don’t do it to him/her. Let him finish what he’s saying. Try to put yourself in her shoes. Just because you see the world differently or don’t express yourselves in the same way, that doesn’t mean that you don’t both have valid needs. Be willing to listen. It will help you understand your spouse so much better, and he or she will be more willing to talk to you if they don’t feel like you’re going to shut him/her down.
Now that we’ve got that on the table, let’s get into that list! I think what I am going to do is give you the list today, but so as to not make this blog post into a novel, I will go into detail on one of the points every week, starting next week.
7. Some Things Should Be Sacred
8. No Secrets
9. Be Equal
10. Balance in All Aspects of the Relationship
If you have any ideas on other things that need to be added to the list, or experiences or questions you’d like to share, please leave them in the comments box!